Almost weaned?

Months before Griffin turned four, he promised to stop making "nenen" when he's four years old. The night of his 4th birthday, he fell asleep without asking for "nenen". He was just lying down on the bed while watching TV until he fell asleep. I was kind of sad that he did not ask for it. I even missed it. However, when he woke up at the middle of the night, I let him nurse again.
The following day, he would still ask to "nenen" but this time he would say, " I want to nenen-na 10 seconds only". That's what he would always say everytime he wanted to nenen. I would count from 1 to 10 then he would stop.

Last night, he wanted to nenen-na 10 seconds. I wanted him to brush his teeth first, but he did not want to. He kept on crying until he gave in to brushing. I allowed him to nenen 10 seconds. When he was done, he was asking for milk in the bottle. I did not answer right away until he started crying saying, "Because I'm still hungry". I felt guilty and told him,"Is that why you did not want to brush?" and he said,"Yes". He said he wanted cheesedog with rice so I made some for him. He just ate a few spoonfuls of rice. He looked sleepy already. I turned off the light and he was just lying down watching TV until he fell asleep.

It makes me so sad when I see him just lying down on the bed at night. I'm so used to him saying to me, "Mommy, I want to nenen", before going to sleep. When he wakes up at night, he used to say, "Mommy, nenen-na" but now he would whimper and touch my shirt but he would not say anything. It seems that I'm the one who's having a hard time weaning Griffin. I allowed him to nurse again when he woke up in the middle of the night. Oh well, at least he knows now that he's supposed to stop nursing already although he still can't stop completely. He needs a little more time to get used to slowly weaning off the breast. I need a little more time too, to get used to this. It has been our bonding time everyday. I did not think it would be hard on my part, but I was wrong.

My baby is really a big boy already.